The salubrious adventures of Doctor 5 also now Citizen Timepiece

Ask and ye shall get it yeah!

2009-04-25T04:26:00.000-07:00

Broken glasses constantly a problem? ,
People always saying, should have gone to sppecsavers? (no one says that , if they do a sharpened 2h pencil does the job).

Well here is the solution to your needs. Newly released :

Tis the News - real digital writings of the actual world

2009-04-22T05:45:00.000-07:00

- April 22 -

A selection of DIY/Ktichenand bathroom shops and showrooms were closed today after an outbreak of tap arousal - This strange occurance was ignored in the hope it would go away, but landed the stores in "hot water" after concerned parents pointed out their concerns.(see pics below for before and after shots (well we didnt catch actual shots "):

Rumours that Lando might be hosting the Late Late are verified :

Fingers crossed for this, if not Johnny Logan knows best. Logan for the Late Late is an address to give your backing to him and help Ireland secure a most worthy host for an otherwise complete shattered window of entertainment. You thought Paul Michael Glaser might be able to fix it , but you'd be wrong.

Weather:

Radiant beams of vitamin d and solar radiation bangin in your face to begin with, later on in the day showers of stress and lonliness. Possibility of tornadoes of melancholy and Tempests of unforseen forthcoming doom, subsiding in the late evening to a glorious sunset much akin to the return of jesus with love and great ideas making most areas by night time.

huey lewis, gerry lewis, lewis form inspector morse- all spread the news

2009-03-26T05:53:00.000-07:00

Here are the picytures of work and in place on the wall. check out www.bombhouse.ie .

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the sauce - no relish,

If im hungover then everyone should be, even my snacks, oh im in trouble now if "The Happening" (see movie storyline imdb) ever comes to fruition - (no pun intended =) yeah ! )

smug, crisp, fresh, helathy,

not so funny meow is it? aw i actually love apples though, - root of all evil that they are .

Some final words from unimpressed skull drain :

Boss original fax post it chops

2009-03-12T06:29:00.000-07:00

Here it is , the start of shop fronts from your dreams :

Straight in with this one - no messsing about - done - .

and also around the corner :

Extra Extra, secrets of cleaning products

2009-02-23T07:23:00.000-08:00

I have held onto this thought for sometime, always forgetting to share the fact , but now its time. So the general consensus toilet duck is called toilet duck due to the neck on the bottle allowing "under the rim cleaning" see below:

i believe its called toilet duck for this reason. (look at photo upside down ):

and no one was more surprised about this thanthe door handle !!:

FACT!

whooosh the hooch , stay loose

2009-02-06T06:38:00.001-08:00

im not sure about this one, really ?!
Actually im not sure about umbreallas in general.

after scouting around this whole blogs of note page thing i have decided to indulge myself and add a new section called "shop front signs and names i think are great ".

Friday equation:

things that look like they perform a certain funtion(+retro charm) x the fact that they perform a completely different function altogether = cool !

eg: the flick-knife hair comb

based on that equation ill be releasing a few gems.
1.
the head of a plug thats actually an mp3player and memory stick, but can also be fused and used as a real plug aswell. (patent pending).

yeah you like what i did there with the mp3 , sound.

available soon - keep a look out on engadget and such sites.

This weeks movie is anchorman - cuz i just saw this ring and the sex panther bit again on http://www.satchelofgravel.com and really wanna watch it now, thanks. but you could do worse than checking out Bats:

this is probably the best cover ive seen for this movie, the bat as the a is priceless - and the tag line, well i have no words for that, it does a service to itself and any addition would be a dis service. Duly warned.

bickkketty baaaam, oh is that raspberry jam, why yes ill have some

2009-01-15T07:10:00.000-08:00

charlie sheen , in a modified car being a phantasm vigilante, in a slick lookin robot suit, cmon, if thats not woth an hour and a half of your time then flickin stations for an hour isnt either. the quality.

http://www.d1.ie AEOD - check out track Tiffany. a speaker chugging, patron eating incubus i wanna hear out an' about.

If one is in the market for top notch jam/preserves, check out these guys, the makers of pockets full of dreams and purses full of tangible delights. "Theres a party in my mouth, thanks St. Dalfours" is the tagline i would like to see on the label, sourse - Dr. Five , check out only some of the selection for delectation:

back soon, happy january.

the pump don't work cause the vandals took the handle

2008-09-12T07:16:00.000-07:00

welledy welledy welledy, good septembering, its been a while, had a fierce awful reaction to Haettenshweiler, im under no illusion that very few look at this, i know a certain s.m babbage might check in time to time, shout out to you there keeping the hobbit population alive, =)

right back to pleasure.

Logan Knows best was off air for summer period briefly, this week Johnny visits a maple syrup factory to see how the process goes and i hasten to add gets himself in quite a "sticky" situation when encouraged to "have a go" by factory staff acknowledging who he actually is presses the wrong button on the machine and sets it into reverse at a crucial stage of production, no serious harm done though and they laugh about it later on, a grand ole chuckle over some taster syrup on wheat crackers, apart from one member of the tour who is intolerant to wheat and gluten so borught his own rice cake style crackers which were initially just for a snack with nutella to keep his blood sugar balanced should he need too, i know a diabetic eating maple syrup, what shouldnt everyone enjoy the goodness, he's very good with doses so well covered.Johnny compares the process of the production and the work being done at Cern LHC to the dismay of the employees and tour guide, "sure its not rocket science" he says , "either is particle acceleration" quips a disgruntled employee, hold me now , dont cry, dont say a word just hold me now and .......

Word: cabbaging thunklin ralliescent composuringly surplusing

on the hunt for a bottle of TK cream soda this week
also want to thank John Joe who i met on a corner wielding his angle grinder ( not a euphemism ) for some top notch grining i needed done. very smooth and tight finish, perfect for paint.

give us a go of your belt - a night in which people wear in belts they would like to exchange with others for new belts . nice.

Alien vs Preadator 2 - no words for it - just watch it the uncut one of course with extra bits, nice little watch.

eat a danish in denmark, an apple turnover in hanover, clubmilk in luxemburg

feel the face of a steam punk.
apple drops revisited - pound of - ye olde sweet ahop- word
if i ad an ammer - i have several and are occassionally useful.

One , two three o clock four o clock , five

2008-07-29T06:27:00.001-07:00

This week our hero gets an interesting script from his agent : Logans run – life begins at 30. It turns out it’s actually from me I’m just trying to steal my own reality show thunder and cheer the man up a bit. After the petrol in the diesel fiasco , well you know.

Also what an absolutely genius Stephen Hawking Legolike.

Word: Legolike, thryumpants, culdging, spanforging

This week I shall be using the guise Mueselli Forfeit. Calling in sick with a claim of an allergy to Times New Roman amongst other unknown fonts which I am being tested for.

Visiting the “Fultrites Bang Jam” many acts , excitement is dampening.

Yeah, giz a call yeah!

2008-07-15T04:50:00.000-07:00

This week on “Logan Knows Best”, the man himself buys some knitwear from an e auction site but the size are in U.S format and so follows the hassle of emailing about returns, exchanging and posting the return. Lunch with Dana leads to all kind of everything on the horizon for our champion. Somebody puts petrol in his diesel car and he decides against buying a six speed car in Ireland thinking sure “what’s another gear” if one can’t use it, what with traffic the way it has been.

Word: Austere, Veracious, Combustible, Manklon

Thinking about starting a collection of something, figured I should collect thoughts and options on what to collect for my collection of something instead. Thus my collection begins.

I you haven’t seen Primer yet then watch it, if you like, its Diamond. Further entertainment comes from the movies forum where it is analysed with excruciating vigour. Especially the fully numbered and ordered time line word for word.

double piece setting

2008-07-10T08:40:00.000-07:00

This week on “Logan knows Best” Johnny has trouble down the supermarket in choosing not only which type of fish to have for dinner, but also crispy batter or breadcrumbs? Donegal Catch or Birdseye or Green Isle , maybe Chip Shop. Tough choices befall our Sage. Also while the fresh juice is the better option the sweeter from concentrate juice is edging as a clear winner with him.

Word: Scumble, Meticulous, Transitory, Tramjaunt

Loving you is easy cause your beautiful.

This week Pi is the gem o the week .

Use french toast (or eggy bread for some) as dividers for your slices of ham or turkey.

precipitation, instigation, information,

2008-07-03T05:52:00.000-07:00

Top o the July,

eateries i would open, but im not: (note , carvery is not pretty nor delicious )

Carvery Cavern.
Luncheon Dungeon.
The Turkey Threshold.
Spandau Gormet.
The Rustic Renaissance.
Bap o' Chop.

Non descript dancing to the mighty force of D.C went down , praise be.

Tip: if its raining outside and you dont want to get wet going to work, dont bother. It more efficient.

My new campiagn for the coming month is to get in touch with former Eurovision winner and general Balladeer Johnny Logan in a bid to sell him and RTE on my idea for a new show starring himself, called (oh wait for it) : Logan Knows Best.

Pure winner.

assuming the guise of Ace Victory, also on the agenda.

want to get back into equations but finding it more difficult than usual.

necessity + unnecessary needs x needs fulfilled (power of 5) / hours per day = median. must work on that one

taken to using actual already cooked rotisserei chicken as oven gloves to take further chickens from the oven.
never ask anyone to smell your fist.

bang these out: candescant, informous, thricing, wonderous

what not to were, what were we not to where?

2008-06-26T07:53:00.000-07:00

Ooooh oooh summer days driftin away, on approx 4-5 centimetres of the finest precipitation I’ve seen this side of the Atlantic, yes I’ve crossed it this is the salubrious adventures not the mildly informative adventures although they kind of might seem so.
So as vie already told some interested and uninterested parties , back in the days leading up to the dot com boom I attempted to take a different route and copyright ROFLMAO ,
Thus when it was used I would receive payment of sorts or at least sell it, but the copyright people and the patent office were having none of it and I was promptly escorted form both buildings, the fools didn’t know what was in schtore. Searching for a repeat in such success as my red-step (later procured by another company and re-coloured) product I was blinded.

This week: brap, scunder, mighty, precipice, wonder-punch.

All fine examples of specimens of words that do be being used. (Copyright free I might add)

Check out The Invasion (thanks to sjd). Literally hidden and a “hidden” (check that out) away gem, straight to Ur DVD outlet.

DC back in town, sweet mother of the holy divine and Blessed Sacrament of thundering lord and almighty three in one cavistons crunch classic Jesus is the dream for that.

oh wow oh really

2008-06-25T08:33:00.000-07:00

right so 1st of april since last one just drioppin this off http://howto.wired.com/wiki/High-Five

will return fiendishly and soon rsme

back and forward and upward and out

2008-04-01T06:43:00.001-07:00

back once again for the renegade master beee four damager power x people

words for the week : scathing, fantastic, exothermic, deface, splendid,

i mainly trying to work in formulas this current time.

d5+cm+8e (x) x tone + freq = good times qed

expanded knowledge + originality x dose of admiration / past assmilation = quality

qed

this week its all about The Lost Boys. all the coreys in one movie, history as such.
bang bang wallop crash ,

check

2008-02-29T14:19:00.000-08:00

tuborg bavarioa, flint lock muskets, kindling, fire hair, new skins,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q6pbZLiLt30

the smell of new shoes

2008-02-20T10:18:00.000-08:00

this weeks words a little late so lets call it a long weekend,

fetching, comprehension, octagonal, default, satisfactory

Electhricithy, , putting a h after every t when its not meant to have one and similarly dropping the h after words tat are supposed to have a h afther te t, is my revival for a while .

things a feel to do more of include also , running a stick along metal railings more, using chocolate fingers ( preferably cadburys) as stirrers for stirring everything, yes including paint, using brandy snaps as slides for playing slide guitar, using digestives as coasters, using the marshmallow bit of coconut creams to hang posters and post its, tortilla as dusters, swiss rolls as firelogs

oreos are for eating only

write all notes in charcoal.
have a desk full of broken pens.

shitty biscuit + chocolate covering = chocolate kimberly ,

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

2008-02-14T10:01:00.000-08:00

Awesome things: female singers who sound unbelievably hot, when they are unbelievably hot, fresh cornflakes with icy ice cold milk eaten with a rounded dessert spoon when the milk has a certain sweetness to it. Skittles will always be amazing, especially the act of putting too many skittles in your mouth and having too much fruit flavoured saliva in your mouth with the chewed up skittle texture it tips my scale. Water when you melt a block of jelly in it, its jelly’s perfect state, before is good, as a solid block of jello, melting in the water tops that , letting it set and stink up your fridge is very wrong. Its sibling intercourse wrong. Having the best sleep , you know that one which will never be equalled in your life up to that point. Finding home even if its’ a finite entity. Free rides on public transport. New toothbrushes and better still chewing tootbrushes.
More words to hear more of:
Contented, connoisseur , indispensable, apothecary , chemist,

is it tuesday or wednesday?

2008-02-12T04:29:00.001-08:00

Thieving hands of an orphaned hobbit.
Fiddlers wrist.

Some more words i want to hear more of for this week:
Thundering, strive, complacent, inappropriate, flask

keep a lookout for upcoming treats of a musical and visual feasting upon the very adrenal gland you so preciously covet like that partner of ur cousins whos not amazing but you would just to piss people off, im disgusted. any way

Distance Mariner and Citizen Timepiece will take you to aldi and back ,

Many Thanks to distance mariner for the simply quite excellent AKA of Citizen Timepiece, quality.

this weeks confectionary of the week is id have to say cola cubes, essentially frosties hotter sister. load up on a kilo at any good pick and mix island around the country.

2008-02-05T04:58:00.000-08:00

Blinding, blinder, unkempt, catastrophic,

This year February is a leap year , i really wish i had the foresight to impregnate something with a chance of said young being born on the 29th , also leaving out the 29th on 500,000 calendars boasting Visions of Ireland probably wasn’t the best move but im paid and unreachable.

Vending machines are just another form of gambling , granted with excellent odds, but sometimes you just plain lose, (when the bastard get stuck on the edge or is a bar too far back) , other times it’s like putting on a bet each way. (you still get something for your money but is it worth what you put in, did you get a toffee crisp instead of a lion bar).

Top spin, top o the pops, top drawer, top hat , top cat, top trump, top deck, top layer, top buzz, top top, topper tippington, toppington mc tip, tipster mc top, topper o topson, toperan o tip. Toppy o tipperson, mc top, mc tip, mac topperson, o topperan, giltopperson, giltipper, o topsagh, topsaigh , toperthon, topperther, topthingly, toppinggale,
Top gate, top level, top o the morning,
Lord tip of top
Lord top of tip, all topsy(ridiculous), top of the line, top ultimate, top soil, top study,

a weekend wasted, is better than a weekend wasted!

2008-01-28T09:22:00.000-08:00

Today is ghostbusters appreciation day,
“ ray for your information the interest rate alone for the first five years comes to 95 thousand dollars”
Oh yeah you should probably go and retrieve a copy of it and watch it.

2H pencils can cut glass. Fact .

So Heidegger was asked to discuss the judgement of taste and finality without representation of a specific end, he said “ I Kant” . ha.

When there’s no bread left because there never is, cream crackers with melted cheese , ketchup is optional , because there are always cream crackers hangin around. No one knows quite how they got into the house , possibly due to some kind of unknown cream cracker stigma, cream crackers ? me? Pah i bought the carrs water biscuits, you tramps, cream crackers are where it is at , now im not specifically championing ja**bs here but they are the preferred brand for many households.
Words i want to hear used more:
Blinding, blinder, unkempt, catastrophic,

Quality,

2008-01-25T09:05:00.000-08:00

http://www.ukemergency.co.uk/police/dscd0484.jpg

once in a life time

2008-01-19T07:02:00.000-08:00

despite dan le sac being "sold out" , sweet christ , sadder than an orphan at chrsitmas whos pet stick just fuckin snapped was the general vibe, but alas, mr tales of the mega rich fizztales.blogspot the rest la la, richie rich got to shake the mans hand as he left the venue, top score, at least two things were the fruit bore from the weekend tree which is under watered , 1 . ghandi's dam (use how you see fit) eg: couldnt give a ghandi's dam , the ghandi's dam on him/her, me ghandi's dam is killing me, you get the idea so , and 2. templars flask, suppose its essentially something to keep your tea in during the crusades also same as above, par example:
i was down in lidl the other week and despite whacking my ghandi's dam off the trolley i proceeded to purchase a templars flask load of cheap confectionary for the mornin.
good solid work

furthermore research in tokyo tells us that people who have sex more than three times a week are guaranteed yes GUARANTEED to live longer and less likely to suffer heart disease , stroke the usaul stuff, thus prostitution or the availing of such services should and could be written off as a medical expense, you lucky medical card holding bastards,

still funny

2008-01-12T20:26:00.001-08:00

apparently old but still hilarious

2008-01-12T20:24:00.000-08:00

well funnyy

club luxemburg

2008-01-07T05:09:00.000-08:00

so heres the plan, new underground esque club opening in luxemburg. called club luxemburg, unfortunately not johnre but thanks for the awesome suggestion sherlock, tops , tip top infact. electro buzz, minimal techno , wednesday night is fire alarm nite when we just let the fire alarm go off and put a rolled up newspaper and a snare drum on the stage. electro karaoke

Luxemburg

2008-01-07T05:03:00.000-08:00

Huge in

joy and prosperity

2008-01-07T04:55:00.000-08:00

stumbled across some old kinder egg toys recently, only the crappy tini terrapin ones though, why were they kept, nnot half as good as building a plane or spinning top. did get a banging little smart car one recently, the sense of achievement after building it it was second to none. still nothing beats the all time top kinder egg gift of a banana basrd spinning top. it sin a safe deposit box. picture of said wonder to follow. what ever happened AGWA a fine alcoholic tipple . Looking to book a des oconnor tribute act if one exists. st john hawk vs. stringfellow hawk ?

ah for !

2007-12-06T10:59:00.000-08:00

sweet thundering holy immaculate jesus, toine says not enough thesbians in this country , ritchie says yep, and they both laugh,

sweet

2007-11-16T07:23:00.000-08:00

sometimes just sometimes the need for a bucket of the colonels finest chicken is the only thing worth living for, but just for those 5 minutes , then its fine, top

statement

2007-11-16T06:49:00.001-08:00

Top drawer top gun top o the range ,

work

2007-11-16T06:26:00.001-08:00

have you heard the news making all the headlines zooming via satellite , have you heard the news making all the headlines fletch is working over tiiiiime ,

home

2007-11-16T06:23:00.000-08:00

home

C.V

2007-11-09T07:20:00.001-08:00

c.v on the way

toine

2007-11-09T06:44:00.000-08:00

A curious character , half french, half tuesday night pregnant,